Dealing with loss is never easy but grief can feel enormous and ever consuming. The last year we have all been wrestling with some kind of loss; it could be the death of a loved one, the loss of a job or plan, or even the fading of the lives we were living. Loss and grief shows up in many forms and we rarely emerge from this battle the same way we went in. Grief is messy and there’s no straight line through it. And while it may feel that the pain is too big to bear, there are small ways you may be able to help shift or ease the overpowering energy that comes with loss.
Crystals aren’t a magic wand that can take the pain away, but they can provide a soft source of comfort and healing vibrations to help guide you through this time. Different gemstones have different powers, some can bring soft compassion, others inner-strength, but all of them will be working towards the same goal – helping you deal with the loss and to enter gentle acceptance. People say that you never fully move out of grief, but that you learn to master it in time. Take a look at these crystals for grief and we hope that they can bring you comfort…
What Are the Stages of Grief?
The big themes of loss and grief are often dealt with in stages. It may sound trite but time is a great healer and moving through the stages will take time and patience with oneself as you process all those emotions. As mentioned, grief isn’t solely reserved for physical death, it can be a spiritual loss, an emotional loss, or even a change in circumstance can bring on a loss too. While we have sketched out the five stages of grief below, remember its not a straight line through these and tangled emotions rarely fit into neat packages nicely. Have courage, have patience, and remember to take a deep breath.
Stage 1: Denial
Even when expected, the initial stage of loss may be too overwhelming to process at first. Instead, we can move into denial, a common defense mechanism that helps keep us numb while we process things at our own pace.
Stage 2: Anger
Moving out of denial and those painful overwhelming feelings can emerge in the form of anger. This anger can be directed at the loss or anything in your path, it’s a big wild emotion and its part of the masking process.
Stage 3: Bargaining
Delicacy and helplessness can settle in during the bargaining stage and you start to pick over all the finer details and make ‘what if’ statements. You may try and remain locked into the past, forcing a different outcome, and imagining all the things that could be different.
Stage 4: Depression
As we shift into the present space, that flood of feeling can leave us feeling drained and empty or completely bewildered and confused. You may shut down completely and question what your life will look like now.
Stage 5: Acceptance
Acceptance isn’t always the end point of this difficult and sometimes life-defining journey. You may sidestep back and forth into the other stages even when you have accepted the loss in your life. Acceptance isn’t always a happy ending either. But it can be a little light at the end of a dark tunnel. It means that you are in the process of processing and that there is hope or a path forward.
8 Powerful Crystals That Help with Grief and Loss
Big energy and bright shades of joy have a time and place but for many dealing with layers of grief will need crystal energy that brings gentle healing, evens out those massive emotions, and makes you feel comforted and cared for. The crystals we have picked are here to keep you grounded, as even as possible, as well rested as can be, and provide a gleam of light that won’t go out.
Carnelian for balancing big energy.
Rose Quartz for self-compassion.
Rhodonite for gentle acceptance.
Moonstone for coping with cycles of change.
Pyrite for adrenal burnout protection.
Amethyst for a natural tranquilizer.
Smoky Quartz for staying grounded.
Lepidolite for releasing suffering.
While its bright glow may not seem appropriate for the heavy cloud above your head, Carnelian can be an excellent healing stone for those moving through the motions of grief. Comforting and warm, Carnelian is a flame that can chase away the demons. This stone is exceptionally talented at helping to balance energy and also fills us with feelings of being supported, safe, and strong enough to carry the weight. It is a stone that connects with the spirit world too meaning that those overarching feelings of loss and dread may not feel so burdensome when we share it with our ancestors. Find out more about the meaning of Carnelian.
Instantly soothing in soft shades of pink, Rose Quartz is one of the gentlest heart chakra healers you could hope for. A truly loving gem with high vibrations, Rose Quartz helps build up your feelings of compassion and calm. There is something reassuring about having Rose Quartz close by when moving through the stages of grief. It can be particularly helpful during the bargaining stage when all those feelings of guilt and self-blame can flood your soul. Here, Rose Quartz softly reminds you to be kind to yourself. Find out more about the meaning of Rose Quartz.
Just like the rose from which it is named, Rhodonite is another soft pink heart stone that can help you to digest shock and panic without flailing blindly. Rhodonite is rich in self-love and excellent at helping you to heal old wounds. It doesn’t just patch up the pain but instead guides you through the journey of clearing the heart and activating the love you need to get through this. In time, Rhodonite helps you to let go of the emotions that are no longer serving you and to move to a place of gentle acceptance. Find out more about the meaning of Rhodonite.
A pearly pale stone that provides light in the darkness, Moonstone is an amazing gem to have close by when moving through the stages of grief. Just like the beautiful bright ball that leaves us in luminous energy every night, Moonstone is a solid reminder that emotions and time and the tides that pull can all work in cycles. It is also a stone of new beginnings which is sometimes the light we need to shift us out of a darker spell. Moonstone is good for all stages of grief but can be especially helpful at guiding you through the numbness that comes with depression and helping to temper those surges of anger. Find out more about the meaning of Moonstone.
Keeping adrenal exhaustion at bay is important during the grief process. As all those heavy emotions are stirred up, it's very easy for overwhelm to settle in, and this can lead to heightened anxiety which in turn could lead to adrenal burnout. Having the fiery energy of Pyrite close by can help. This nugget of fools gold can absorb excess energy and can connect with your solar plexus to bring balance and respite which lead to emotional healing. Find out more about the meaning of Pyrite.
Forever spiritual and serene, Amethyst is a natural tranquilizer that can quiet the mind, soothe the body, and soften the soul. For those moments when you feel completely overwhelmed or lost in the forest of feeling, this cerebral stone can bring you back to your core and hold you there. Amethyst is all emotional comfort especially when the feelings are too big to bear. It quietens anger, ebbs away rage, takes the edge off anxiety, and can also help you sleep at night. Find out more about the meaning of Amethyst.
For those who are grieving or dealing with loss it may often feel like you are untethered and being carried along with a great billowing wind. This is where Smoky Quartz can help. Smoky Quartz comes with strong grounding properties and can help you to feel rooted and stable even when your emotions are aiming to knock you off your feet. It can be a comfort to know that this quartz can be an anchor and help you to process your feelings. From the initial anger that arises to the deep breath of acceptance, Smoky Quartz brings its intuition and promotes healthy action throughout the journey. Smoky Quartz is also a good depression aid as it helps shift negative energy into positive. Find out more about the meaning of Smoky Quartz.
Also known as a stone of transition, Lepidolite is a lullaby with its gentle purple and pink hues and its lithium rich energy. For those feeling like they are constantly kicking underwater, Lepidolite can grant you respite thanks to its calming influence. Far from just temper the senses, Lepidolite invites you gently to do the work you need to do when moving through grief. It invites you to release trauma and suffering and to move towards a place of deeper healing on this long and complicated journey. Find out more about the meaning of Lepidolite.
How to Use These Gemstones to Cope With Grief and Loss
Moving through the shadows of the grieving process and there are no short cuts, you will take the time that is needed for you and you alone. That doesn’t mean that support isn’t available, whether its talking to someone, practicing self-care and patience, or sitting in quiet meditation with these healing gemstones. Here are a few ideas to help you to tap into a connection with these stones and to bring about healing…
- Wear a piece of gemstone jewelry and be comforted by the stone against your skin. This will also send healing vibrations directly to the heart or whatever chakra is calling for support.
- Place one of the soothing gemstones beneath your pillow to bring proper rest and relief from sleepless nights and negative feelings.
- Hold a worry stone in your hand whenever you feel the waves of emotion and let the crystal bring you back down from the ledge.
- Meditate with the crystal or place on whichever chakra needs healing to help you through. For example, those who feel the sharp pain of heartbreak can place a crystal of unconditional love on their heart chakra space. Those who need to tap into their intuition to move through this can place one of these best crystals on their forehead to tap into the third eye, etc.
Other healing crystals that can help in times of grief include Apache Tears, Obsidian, Aquamarine, Calcite, Agate, Chrysocolla, Lapis Lazuli, Malachite, Angelite, Rhodochrosite, and Tourmaline.
A Final Thought
Grief can feel endless and during the darker moments we really need to find a kindness and certain kind of strength stashed deep within. Time will help to heal these raw wounds but that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t find a sense of softness along the way. We hope these crystals can help you to find comfort and loving energy that keeps you afloat and connected to a promise of the return of some kind of inner peace along the pathway of these difficult times.
If you feel compelled to share your experiences or your favorite crystal that you turn to during low moments we would love to hear from you.